Potentia Spotlight: Chris Cessna, LMFT, MFC

Potentia Spotlight: Chris Cessna, LMFT, MFC

Working with Chris and getting to know his heart and passion for helping people live more connected and meaningful lives is truly inspiring. In a world where cynicism runs rampant, Chris is a breathe of fresh air with his integrity around this profession, work ethic, and passion for always learning + growing. Chris’s clients and colleagues are better people because we know him and our profession is better because he is in it. I am excited for you all to get to know Chris a bit better today.  – Rebecca

Where are you from?

I’m originally from small town Central Illinois, a town of 650 people called Potomac.  

Why did you become a therapist?

That’s a long story!  Throughout college and after moving to San Diego, I always had this vague desire to “help people”, but I had no specific direction or vision for that.  After working for several nonprofit organizations where my caseload was enormous (as high as 115 clients) and I felt like I wasn’t having the depth of impact I’d hoped for, I began looking into options that would allow me to really dig deep into people’s stories and offer the opportunity for healing, hope, and real change.  That led me towards pursuing a career as a therapist.

What is your philosophy to healing?

I believe people have the best opportunity to grow when they can experience a felt sense of safety. Through providing a safe emotional space for people to engage with the reality of their struggle, they can begin to pay attention to their story in a different way, make sense of the ways they have tried to cope in the past, and find freedom from the shame and pain that has kept them stuck. Understanding how our brains and bodies respond to threat and trauma, we can literally change the functioning of our brains and live a wholehearted, integrated life.  

How do you define self care?

Paying attention to what we need to be at our best, and taking steps (sometimes small, imperfect, and inconsistent steps) towards those things.  When we attune to the things that are important for our minds, bodies, and relationships, we are not being selfish.  We are giving ourselves and those around us more than we possibly could when we are exhausted, frustrated, and burned out.  

Why do you think so many people are uncomfortable asking for help?

We are constantly bombarded with messages that tell us we are not enough. Very often when we feel like there is an issue that needs to be addressed, those messages are amplified.  We hear in our minds what we imagine others would think – our families, our friends, and our faith communities.  It is so easy to get stuck in inaction because we think we should be “stronger”, able to “move on”, or that if we only had “more faith”, it wouldn’t be a problem.  Yet until we are able to look honestly at what is going on in our lives, we aren’t able to move through it or beyond it.  

What is your go-to self care ‘tool’ or ‘practice’?

My preferred self-care includes long hikes out in nature and laid back time with friends.  The reality of a busy life doesn’t frequently allow for this, so self-care typically involves time alone in silence and reflection.  Being still, listening to music, and creating space to breathe without an agenda or a to do list.  

What do you do for fun?

See above!   I love hiking, especially getting out for multi day backpacking trips in the Sierra.  I have three young children that provide a lot of laughs and entertainment.  

What are your favourite books?

This one is hard to narrow down for me, but The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk is at the top of the list.  It addresses the impact of traumatic experiences in a way that is helpful for therapists and for people who are dealing with the aftermath of trauma.  

Others include The Developing Mind by Dan Siegel, The Science of the Art of Psychotherapy by Alan Schore, and Daring Greatly by Brene Brown.   There are so many more!

What is your favourite book to recommend?

There are so many, but the one that I seem to recommend most is Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. It is such an accessible and relevant book for anyone, and the way she communicates about shame and vulnerability seems to have an impact on everyone who engages with it.  

The Whole Brain Child by Dan Siegel is the book I most often recommend to anyone hoping to address issues in parenting.   

What is your favourite quote or mantra –  and why?

“Faith does not need to push the river because faith is able to trust that there is a river. The river is flowing. We are in it.”  – Richard Rohr

This is a reminder that faith is about trust, not about striving, working, or putting together a perfect formula.  

“We can’t selectively numb emotion.  Numb the dark, and you numb the light.”  – Brene Brown

I see this play out in my work daily.  Trying to numb our pain inevitably leads us to an inability to experience joy, happiness, and connection.  

What is your favourite meal to cook?

I love making pulled pork on my smoker.  It is a 12-16 hour process that is a lot of fun for me and results in absolutely delicious food.  

Email Chris.

Call Chris at 619.819.0283 ext 2

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Potentia Spotlight: Megan Holt, DrPH, MPH, RD

Potentia Spotlight: Megan Holt, DrPH, MPH, RD

This is a new series which will feature many of the incredible clinicians at Potentia. I am thrilled to have Megan Holt kick off this series as we have been working together for over a decade. She was all in when I shared with her a vision to have our services under the same roof so we can best support our clients and their families. Her training, passion, and standards of care make her one-of-a kind in this city. Her passion to work hard, play hard and contribute to her field  – along with her awesome sense of humor and love of animals – make her a joy to work with at Potentia.” – Rebecca 

Where are you from?

Born in Corvallis, Oregon, though I come from a large family of proud Aussies.

Why did you become a clinician and researcher?

I’ve always been very curious, and I have a deep appreciation for science and the scientific method. I’m always searching for the truth (sound answers and explanations) and evidence.  If I were to work solely as a researcher, I’d miss that human interaction that I have in working with patients/clients, and I also love to teach. I believe I was born to be in the role of helping others navigate the complex and noisy world of nutrition and disease prevention.

What is your philosophy to healing?

In my world, it’s ‘food first’, meaning supplements are just that (merely supplemental to a sound quality of diet).

What does health mean to you?

I’m in the position of thinking of health as a ‘big picture’ construct, and I favor thinking of how our choices today influence our health 5 years out….10 years out (versus living solely in the ‘now’). Whole-person health implies not only the absence of physical or emotional ailments, but a quality of life that one finds at least acceptable.

How do you define self care?

For me, self care means taking proactive measures to ensure that my quality of life is somewhere between good and excellent at all times.

Why do you think so many people are uncomfortable asking for help?

It’s embarrassing for some, and some of the life skills we need to relearn or need coaching around seem ‘obvious’ or ‘intuitive’. Also, people look at mental health support as a service reserved for folks who are hitting bottom, or perhaps have serious unabating psychological issues, versus something tremendously helpful that we can access as a means of preventive care.

What is your go-to self care ‘tool’ or ‘practice’?

Jumping in the water for a swim, or walking my pup and listening to an intriguing podcast or some great new music. Or, wandering around Anthropologie and smelling all of the candles. <3

What do you do for fun?

I LOVE being in and on the water….swimming, surfing, kayaking, rafting….all of it. I love farmers markets and plant-based foods. I love gorgeous craft cocktails (making and drinking) and live music/music festivals and I love spending time with my puppy and my fiance.

What are your favourite books?

I don’t read for fun much outside of work. A few favorites, however: Food Politics by Marion Nestle and China Study by T.Colin Campbell.  But I LOVE podcasts….they are like candy for me! Favorites include Radiolab, Naked Scientist, Criminal, S Town, This American Life and Hidden Brain. Occasionally, I listen to Joe Rogan and Tim Ferriss, but mostly to get a sense of where guys are getting all of these wacky supplement and product ideas.  We’ll call it market research 😉

What is your favourite book to recommend?

I don’t know that it’s my favorite book to recommend, but I find myself recommending Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Reych or Making Peace with Food by Susan Kano most frequently.

What is your favourite quote or mantra –  and why?

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

– Steve Jobs

I find Steve Jobs very inspiring given the intensity and focus with which he pursued his professional interests. I believe that we know best what is best for ourselves, and that the outside noise and opinions of others can muddy the waters at times. So this really resonates with me, and reminds me to be authentic, and to turn inward for answers.  I often read his quotes on Sundays as they tend to energize me for the upcoming week of work.

What is your favourite song when you need courage?

Anything by Zero 7 or Amy Winehouse.

What is your favourite meal to cook?

Pumpkin Garbanzo Bean Curry. Pumpkin anything and everything, really.

Email Megan.

Call Megan at 619.819.0283 ext 1

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Mindful Self-Care Practices

There is a lot of talk about mindfulness these days. For good reason. Getting curious about what you are feeling and where you are feeling it in your body – and working on doing this without judgement or criticism taking over – has helped many people sustain and deepen their healing.

Sometimes it takes a whole lot of energy just to notice what you are feeling and where you are feeling it in your body. Our society as a whole is pretty darn good at numbing and doing everything we can to not notice what is going on beyond the loud noise between our ears.

As a result, there is often pushback on these practices as inefficient or a waste of time. If it were easy, there would not be the protective blocks around doing this practice. Looking inside with curiosity and compassion may feel like it has the potential to open up a pandoras box of what you have worked so hard to keep at bay.

Yet, when your brain and your body begin to trust that feeling difficult emotions will not overwhelm you, it can be a game changer in how you show up in life – especially while working on trauma, anxiety, depression, obsessive and compulsive thoughts and behaviors, grief and more.

Stephanie Godwin, LMFT at Potentia, compiled the following handout below so you can practice noticing what is going on with your feelings and your body. Download the handout below and post it in places that can serve as a reminder to prompt these practices. Doing a “you-turn” and getting to know your internal system is a powerful resource in your own mental, physical, and spiritual practices.

Which of these practices is the most helpful for you? 

Which of these practices is the most difficult for you?

Keep us posted on how we can support you showing up with more calm, confidence and clarity in your life. It is possible and help is available.

With gratitude –

Rebecca Ching, LMFT

 

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What is the Ketogenic diet? And why is this diet so popular?

What is the Ketogenic diet? And why is this diet so popular? | Potentia Therapy

 

By Megan Holt, DrPH, MPH, RD

The ketogenic diet is another iteration of a low-carbohydrate, high fat diet.  While the diet appears to have experienced a rise in popularity over the past couple of years, it was actually coined by a physician, Russel Wilder, from Mayo Clinic, back in 1921.

Carbohydrates from food are a primary substrate for glucose, but in this particular instance, the liver is forced to use fat for fuel, which is then converted to ketone bodies.

Dr. Wilder was aiming to induce ketosis through the diet, which is a metabolic state within which the body must rely on ketone bodies as a primary energy source in the absence of glucose.

A ketogenic diet has been used in pediatric populations for several decades, as there is evidence to support a subsequent reduction in seizure activity in children with epilepsy, though concerns around adequate calorie provision, stunted growth and development of effective medications for epilepsy resulted in a decline in its use. Evidence has been less compelling among adults with epilepsy, however.

Earlier versions of the diet also included a fluid restriction, though this feature fell by the wayside after reports of adverse events due to dehydration (namely constipation and kidney stones).

Most ketogenic diets are marked by an intake of carbohydrates under 20g/day, or rough macronutrient goals of 70% (or more) of calories from fat, 10% (or less) from carbohydrate and 15 – 20% from protein.

This translates to liberal intakes of meats, eggs, butter, oils, cream, nuts and seeds, and very restricted intakes of grains, starchy vegetables, beans/legumes, fruits and added sugars.

Think repurposed “Atkins Diet”, but more restricted (though the ketogenic diet technically preceded Atkins by several decades).  This has become particularly popular among those pursuing weight loss, as well as with athletes seeking performance gains and changes in body composition.

Part of the attraction here lies within the simplistic guidelines….it is easy for followers to understand.  The diet promises rapid weight loss and blood sugar stability, which in part is an accurate claim.

Any time we restrict large groups of readily available foods, we have potential for weight loss. When one loses weight rapidly, much of that initial weight loss is accounted for by fluid weight and muscle catabolism (breakdown). Further, rapid weight loss can be taxing on the gallbladder and heart, and we run the risk of suffering from nutrient deficiencies as a result of inadequate intake.

This is especially true given that many of the processed/refined foods are easy to access, and just as easy to passively over consume.

Elimination of these foods, in addition to any weight lost, will also give a person a reprieve from erratic changes in blood sugar and corresponding fluctuations in energy levels, though this differentially affects persons who are struggling with overeating carbohydrates (i.e. blood sugar changes are much less dramatic in persons consuming carbohydrate in appropriate proportions).  Simply put, we do not need to go on a diet in order to better manage blood sugar and energy levels.

Athletes are typically hit especially hard by the lack of available energy due to the carbohydrate restriction. Not only does performance and power output suffer, but injury risk increases, as carbohydrates play a vital role in buffering the inflammation and tissue damage that are inflicted by exercise.
 

What are the downsides?

When used for treatment of pediatric epilepsy, the ketogenic diet is typically prescribed in conjunction with close medical monitoring, and only for a short period of time.

With the diet’s surge in popularity among athletes and weight loss seekers, there’s been a deviation from safety guidelines and medical monitoring, and followers are often in ketotic states for extended periods of time without supervision. Given the risks associated with following such an extreme and limited diet, medical oversight is crucial in order to monitor vital signs, organ function (kidney, liver, gallbladder, etc.) as well as blood levels of vitamins, minerals, electrolytes and immune parameters.

Oh, and we can’t neglect to mention the evidence, which does not favor this, or any other fad diet, in terms of weight loss sustainability (nearly all dieters regain weight within 6 months of embarking on the diet). 

 Suggested macronutrient distributions for healthy persons are as follows. Roughly:

  • 50-60% calories from carbohydrate
  • 25-30% fat and 10-20% protein.

This may look like a typical dinner meal for many people: 4oz salmon, ¾ to 1 cup of brown rice and 1 cup of colorful veggies with liberal olive oil. Due to the severe restriction of carbohydrate on this diet, we face a number of concerns around vitamin, mineral and electrolyte deficiencies (and the corresponding deficiency symptoms, such as fatigue, depressed immune function, chest pain, nausea and confusion, to name a few).

In situations where ketogenic diets are adequately supervised, followers are prescribed supplements on a daily basis. However, this becomes a bit of a guessing game in our typical ambulatory population, and the tendency is to either overdo supplementation or neglect supplements altogether.  Read more about supplements in our post “Tips on Becoming an Armed and Informed Consumer of Dietary Supplements”.

Other important concerns include risk of hyperlipidemia (the diet can raise ‘bad’ cholesterol while diminishing ‘good’ cholesterol levels).  Often, there is little attention given to the types or quality of fats consumed while on low carbohydrate diets, which exacerbates hyperlipidemia.

In children or adolescents who are actively growing, ketogenic diets have been shown to stunt growth, which is thought to be due to the fact that the diet can result in a reduction of growth factors and hormones.

Kidney stones, acidosis, loss of bone density, sluggish bowels/constipation (even with adequate fluids and fiber intake), reflux (due to high fat content) and nausea are other relatively common risks with a ketogenic diet. 

In closing, there are safer and more sustainable strategies for increasing energy levels and stabilizing blood sugar.  Not waiting too long to eat (eating every 3-4 hours), maintaining a diverse diet, comprised largely of whole foods with few, recognizable ingredients is a wonderful (and sustainable) place to start. However, if you are planning on adopting a ketogenic diet, please make sure you do so under the care of a registered dietitian and physician.

Click here to contact Dr. Megan Holt.

References

Bansal S, Cramp L, Blalock D, Zelleke T, Carpenter J, Kao A. (2014). The ketogenic diet: initiation at goal calories versus gradual caloric advancement. Pediatr Neurol, 50(1): 26-30.

Bergqvist AG.(2012).  Long-term monitoring of the ketogenic diet: do’s and don’ts. Epilepsy Res,100(3):261-266.

Freeman JM, Kossoff EH, Hartman AL. (2007.) “The ketogenic diet: One decade later”. Pediatrics, 119(3): 535–43.

Johnstone AM, Horgan GW, Murison SD, Bremner DM & Lobley GE. (2008). Effects of a high-protein ketogenic diet on hunger, appetite and weight loss of obese men feeding ad libitum.   Am J Clin Nutr, 87(1): 44-55.

Kossoff EH, Zupec-Kania BA, Amark PE, et al. (2009). Optimal clinical management of children receiving the ketogenic diet: recommendations of the International Ketogenic Diet Study Group. Epilepsia, 50(2):304-317.

Kossoff EH, Zupec-Kania BA, Rho JM. (2009). Ketogenic diets: An update for child neurologists. J Child Neurol, 24(8): 979–88.

Mann T. (2015). Secrets from the eating lab: The science of weight loss, the myth of willpower, and why you should never diet again. Harper Wave.

Sampath AE, Kossoff H, Furth SL, Pyzik PL, Vining EP. (2007). Kidney stones and the ketogenic diet: risk factors and prevention. J Child Neurol, 22(4):375-378.

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Tips on Becoming an Armed and Informed Consumer of Dietary Supplements

 

Note from Rebecca: I am so grateful for Dr. Megan Holt’s wisdom, experience and insight on all things nutrition and wellness. There is A LOT of offerings out there that make claims to better our health but many are lacking in solid research and/or regulation. We are all about helping those in our community be better informed consumers of time and resources. Below, Megan will share some important information about dietary supplements – looking forward to your thoughts and questions!

Many of us regard dietary supplements as ‘harmless’, but did you know that supplements vary tremendously in terms of potency and purity?

We need to be concerned with not only the supplement’s effectiveness, but also with whether or not the supplement actually contains the stated ingredients in the stated amounts. Adulteration is common, as manufacturers, as well as suppliers of the raw ingredients, often try to cut costs by cutting corners.

Manufacturers may have the best intentions in terms of adhering to ethical standards, but perhaps suppliers of the raw ingredients are more concerned with profit.

Have manufacturers’ done their homework? The industry is ‘regulated’, but loosely at best.

Dietary supplements can be a wonderful resource for those of us who need them, and many of the claims regarding their benefits are supported by sound evidence. Asking the following questions of your provider may be helpful upon receiving recommendations to begin taking a supplement.

  1. What is the optimal daily dosage for my condition?
  2. Can you offer any reliable brand recommendations?
  3. Are there any supplement-drug or supplement-food interactions that I should be aware of?
  4. Can I instead meet these needs through the diet? How? Which foods and in what amounts?
  5. Where can I find evidence-based information on the safety and efficacy of dietary supplements?
  6. What are the known side effects?
  7. Has the supplement been tested by an independent lab? Is it USP (United States Pharmacopeial Convention) verified?
  8. How much do they cost?

This fabulous documentary (free to watch) “Supplements and Safety” is a great place to start.

The NIH Office of Dietary Supplements offers a number of helpful fact sheets on individual vitamins and minerals.

Further, PubMed Dietary Supplement Subset provides a rich database should you be interested in reading the literature on specific dietary supplements.

Your provider may not have all of the answers to these questions, but it’s important that they be able to speak to most of them. Advocate and ask – use your voice!

Make sure to join us on Thursday August 3rd, 2017 at 10am PDT for a conversation with Secrets from the Eating Lab Author Traci Mann, PhD + Rebecca Ching, LMFT. Click here to register for the free webinar!

 

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A Different Perspective on Scarcity Mindset and Responding to a Culture of Never Enough

Scarcitymindset

Note: This adapted post was first posted on the Darling Magazine blog summer of 2016. 

WHAT IS SCARCITY MINDSET?

Down to our DNA, we crave connection, adventure and a life of meaning and purpose. If you are living from a narrative fueled by scarcity mindset, the world can quickly become small, lonely and scary, shrouded in judgement and entrenched in the never-ending hustle for safety.

When we don’t believe we are enough – that we are doing enough, or that there is enough opportunity in the world for us – then a scarcity mindset is in the driver’s seat where you belong. Scarcity mindset is a cocktail of shame; it’s obsessive comparison and competition, and a disengagement from taking risks which may result in failure, being misunderstood or being seen as flawed. Living from a scarcity mindset leads to emotional exhaustion and constant distrust.

The following are warning signs that scarcity mindset is impacting your confidence. You…

Are in a constant state of comparison.
Find yourself wishing others do not succeed and are consumed by competition.
Find your worth and identity are externally motivated.
Feel worse about yourself after an interaction with someone in person or on social media.
Are constantly anxious but do not know why.
Are clinging to perfection as the ideal way of being/doing.

Becoming a wise consumer of information is crucial in our culture of ‘never enough.’ Relentless messages about whether you are enough, there is enough or your are doing enough takes a toll on the brain and the body. Scarcity mindset can hijack your confidence, your trust and confuse what you value by using the fear of disconnection and rejection as your guide on how to think and act. Marketers, advertisers and others desiring to get you to buy, vote, share, or believe are attuned to the psychology of human behavior, and are aware that a scarcity mindset is a powerful force of influence that allows fear and shame to be the leading emotions driving your decision making process.

Scarcity mindset can hijack your confidence, your trust and confuse what you value by using the fear of disconnection and rejection as your guide.

At the root of scarcity mindset is fear. Fear is an important and protective emotion, but too much fear can leave the nervous system in a constant state of hyper-vigilance, seeking immediate relief and comfort. This intense, emotional state chips away at the resilience needed to tolerate sitting in the space of suffering and struggle, and finding ways to grow from it.

Choosing to invest in relationships and dreams leaves all of us vulnerable to a scarcity mindset. Left unchecked, it infects our ability to trust and stay grounded in knowing that things will be okay, even when the outcome is uncertain. When self-worth becomes intertwined with what you do, look like or have, confidence disappears and the chase for the approval of others becomes the norm. Claiming the power and agency given to all of us is a crucial practice and a powerful resource in response to the messages of scarcity.

A NEW PERSPECTIVE ON SCARCITY MINDSET

Here is the curve ball on scarcity mindset: It has a noble cause. It’s trying to protect you from failure, rejection, being separated from needed connection. Scarcity mindset is actually a protective part of your inner world and is not to be loathed, fixed, or banished. It is one of the brain’s many ways of trying to keep you safe.

Most of the threats we experience these days are to our sense of self — keeping our nervous system on high alert. This is exhausting and can have a detrimental impact on your physical and emotional well-being. Scarcity mindset gets you to turn on yourself in an attempt to get safe.

When you develop confidence in the face of uncertainty, fear has a way of cleansing and clarifying – you become powerful instead of paralyzed. 

One question will help you get clarity and to the heart of how scarcity mindset is impacting your life today: What are you afraid of?

This self-awareness is crucial. When you take the time to be honest about your fears, you are then able begin the work to re-wire your brain’s responses to these threats. When you develop confidence in the face of uncertainty, fear has a way of cleansing and clarifying – you become powerful instead of paralyzed.

Scarcity mindset gets you to turn on yourself in an attempt to get safe. In her book, Presence: Bringing your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges, Amy Cuddy, Ph.D. writes about the importance of claiming our personal power to stay grounded in our self-confidence:

“Personal Power is characterized by freedom from dominance of others. It is infinite, as opposed to zero-sum – it’s about access to and control of limitless inner resources, such as our skills and abilities, our deeply held values, our true personalities, our boldest selves…Personal power makes us more open, optimistic, and risk tolerant and therefore more likely to notice and take advantage of opportunities.”

HOW TO RESPOND TO SCARCITY MINDSET

It’s easy to over-identify with the pain and suffering we see around us. Approach the scarcity mindset part of you with curiosity and compassion. Confidence combined with the lens of common humanity — we are in this human journey together — reminds you to stay grounded in the truth that your imperfections, failures, mistakes and difficult life experiences are what unites us all. It is a part of being human.

Respond to self-critical thoughts with compassion and curiosity. Instead of viewing these thoughts at the enemy and something to be eliminated, recognize this part of your inner life is trying to protect you and serves a purpose.

On the hard days, give yourself permission to:

– Unfollow
– Unplug
– Reach out and connect with someone, in person
– Practice choosing respect, which may feel awkward and inauthentic at first
– Rest
– Move
– Get outside

Caution against seeing abundance as the opposite of scarcity – which is a common message in response to scarcity. As Brené Brown notes in Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead, “The counter approach to living in scarcity is not about abundance. In fact, I think abundance and scarcity are two sides of the same coin.” Chasing abundance only fuels scarcity mindset and the feelings of never enough.

Does a scarcity mindset sound familiar to you? What is is one way you can challenge yourself to live outside of fear?

Scarcity mindset is not going anywhere, especially in our information age where so much money is to be made by seeking quick fixes to the distress of not feeling enough. Fight to claim your power and confidence in this culture of never enough and know the space you create will be contagious. The world needs you to show up and be seen.

With gratitude –

Rebecca

 

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Consider making this one thing a priority in 2017…

therapy-couch-at-potentia

“The opposite of belonging is to feel isolated and always (all ways) on the margin, an outsider. to belong is to know, even in the middle of the night, that I am among friends.”

Peter Block in Community – The Structure of Belonging. 

At Potentia, we understand the deep need for all of us to find a place to belong. We also know first hand hand how easy it is to let parts of your story hijack your present and your future.

Our culture’s mixed messages around what it means to be well can fuel fears of being misunderstood, keeping many scared while rumbling in secret with stories of struggle, afraid of losing what matters most – connection.

Addictions, betrayal, mental health struggles, grief, trauma, perfectionism and shame touch all of us directly and indirectly through those we love and lead. Attempting to try and think yourself out of your pain often exacerbates the pain fueled by the barriers of stigma + access to resources – keeping way too many people in isolation.

Though struggle can trigger feelings of:

  • fatigue from stagnated attempts to heal
  • overwhelm
  • frustration
  • being trapped by the belief that change is not possible

it is easy to forget that struggle is not failure but a place of growth, wisdom. And every rumble to heal has a timeline of its own – so caution against comparing your struggle to the journey of others.

I know we are biased on this matter but we believe one of the best gifts you can give yourself and your loved ones is to make healing emotionally something to respect and value.

Our hope is that you will make your mental health a priority now and in the new year. Leaving mental health issues unaddressed will make it harder to achieve your goals, desires, dreams, and to find that sense of deep belonging within and with those in your life. 

Yes… the time, resources and energy that is needed to heal is nothing but tidy and streamlined – any quick fix plan offered to heal deep soul pain will fall short of you showing up day in and day out to do the messy work to heal.

Slower is often faster when it comes to mental health healing. Making mental health a priority in your life will help you show up in your life with more clarity, connection and confidence.

All of us at Potentia continue to invest our own time and resources studying, training, consulting and collaborating – along with supporting our own mental health –  so we can offer our clients and their families the best support. We also believe you play a crucial role in the process of changing the stigma around mental health issues. By doing your own deep soul work, you are leading by example. Your courage in this process will be contagious and inspire others to take the brave leap to ask for help.

We would be honored to help you and those you care for find relief and more meaning in life. If you are looking for resources outside of the San Diego area, check out the following sites to find support near you:

Psychology Today

edreferral.com

EMDRIA.org

Center for Self Leadership

The Daring Way™

Cheers to (re) Defining Health in 2017! Keep us posted on how we can be a resource for you.

With gratitude –

Rebecca

 

PS – We would love for you to come to our I Choose Respect Open House + Fundraiser on January 14th, 2017 from 4-7PM. Local artists and makers will be featured along with great food + community plus our I Choose respect photo booth as we prepare for our 4th annual I Choose Respect effort. Click on the image below to register!

 

icr-2017-open-house

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Do you suffer from Infobesity?

Infobesity

When you are struggling – finding a friend, family member, mentor, colleague or just googling your question will help you find advice on how to:

  • stop
  • stop eating
  • stop hurting yourself
  • lose weight
  • gain weight
  • love the body you are in;
  • eat
  • eat more
  • eat less;
  • drink more
  • drink less
  • start
  • move
  • finish
  • slow down
  • go faster
  • fix it
  • love
  • create
  • get over it
  • improve your boundaries
  • dress differently
  • have faith
  • trust
  • pray
  • feel
  • read more
  • learn more
  • listen
  • be vulnerable
  • relax
  • guard your heart
  • respect the process
  • go for it
  • walk away
  • let it go
  • take things less seriously
  • heal
  • feel
  • cry
  • get angry
  • try
  • take a risk
  • plan for the future
  • enjoy being single
  • date
  • get married
  • have kids
  • wait to have kids
  • save
  • tithe
  • make more money
  • spend more time with your family
  • be
  • be cautious
  • be in the moment
  • be safe
  • be yourself
  • change

There is not a lack of advice and opinion in our world.  And there is definitely not a lack of advice givers. A good number of those dispensing advice share nuggets of wisdom that are solid, appropriate and spot on for what is needed at the moment.

Caution against filling up on the voices which fuel hate, fear, judgement and collude with the parts of our inner world which desire certainty and rigidity. As you seek answers, make sure you are not suffering from infobesity.

Infobesity keeps you from trusting yourself, your faith and the inner circle of people who have earned the right to speak into your life. Overloading on information from other sources is rarely satisfying and increases the cravings to keep going back in search for empty calorie answers – with the hope of calming your brain and soul- only to leave you stuck and spinning in the same place.

Research which is fueled by curiosity and calm is different than infobesity. It is grounding and leads to clarity and confidence. Infobesity fuels stagnation, overwhelm and numbing out.

The irony is not lost here as I suggest a response to the quest for relief and answers. The team at Potentia is honored to walk with our clients as they seek to discover what it means to be well based on their unique story, body and interests.

To avoid infobesity – develop a practice of unplugging, pause before actions, stay curious and connected to your desire to heal and learn. Do the work to build up resilience in the space of vulnerability and shame triggers. Recognize feeling dark emotions is a part of being human. Ask for help from resources who have earned your trust when the quest for information+answers is overwhelming and numbing. Develop the confidence to lead and love when parts of your soul are afraid.

I am curious – how has infobesity impacted you?

How do you know the difference between grounded curiosity and a numbing out quest for information and answers?

How do you handle uncertainty in this information age? 

Now, time to unplug…

With gratitude –

Rebecca

 

 

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Respect over Accept: 2016 #ichooserespect starts on Monday!

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Hello and happy weekend!

The following is a video clip I filmed yesterday about Potentia’s #ichooserespect effort before I picked up my kids from school. I made the commitment to shoot this in one shot and go with it no matter what – so here you go!

Towards the end, I was a little confused by what you see verses what I see on my monitor when I had some written visuals to share – so enjoy the entertainment as I navigate sharing information with you.

In summary, the main points in the video are:

  • The history of #ichooserespect
  • Why I added #storyshame in year two
  • My thoughts on why addressing these issues are so important and not superficial “phases”
  • How you can participate in #ichooserespect no matter where you are in the world!

 

ICR vlog 2016 from Rebecca Bass-Ching on Vimeo.

I look forward to seeing many of you on Facebook or Instagram next month and learning how you choose respect over body + story shame. Thanks in advance for joining the conversation.

With gratitude  –

Rebecca

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7 Must-Read Quotes from Potentia’s Featured Book of the Month: Secrets from the Eating Lab by Traci Mann, PhD

Eatinglabbest

 

Hello!

Congratulations on completing week one of the 52 weeks of 2016!

If you are like most people in our country, some of your goals/resolutions/intentions for the new year are around your health: how you feed, move and rest your body.

It is absolutely important to make health a priority (though not an obsession) in your life.

Yet, breaking through the noise about what it really means to be healthy is quite the challenge these days.

There are so many differing views on how to eat, how to move your body, what food is “good” and “bad” for you.

As a result, the meaning of health has become so skewed and good marketing that speaks well to your struggles and desired goals can also add to the confusion of what it means to be well.

Secrets from the Eating Lab: The Science of Weight Loss, the Myth of Willpower, and Why You Should Never Diet by Traci Mann, PhD is a gem of a book that reads with ease while digging into some involved research around the science behind a lot of the narratives around health, obesity, food choices and more.

I really appreciate how she guides the reader:

  • through the history and evolution of dieting
  • how to better discern the quality of the research so many health “facts” are based on
  • figure out what the key factors are which impact and define health

Below are some of my favorite quotes from the book along with my additional thoughts and reflections. It was really hard to decide which nuggets to quote from this book as Dr. Mann has packed in so much wisdom. It is a worthy investment, for sure!

1. The use of the BMI is controversial because the formula for calculating it is not based on any understanding of how height and weight relate to each other, and because people who have high muscle mass tend to get categorized as overweight, despite having very little fat. (p.4)

  • At Potentia, we have educated our clients and community for years on the flaws of the BMI as a measure of health. It is more of a marketing tool and not an evidenced based measure of true health. Be wary of how you use this information to define your definition of health. It also can be very shaming and trigger behaviors that are unsafe.

2. If their (the weight loss industry) products were effective in leading to long-term weight loss, they would soon put themselves out of business. These businesses count on repeat customers. Richard Samber, the longtime financial chairman of Weight Watchers, likened dieting to playing the lottery. “If you don’t win, you play it again. Maybe you’ll win the second time. When asked how the business could be successful when only 16 percent of customers maintained their weight loss, he said “It’s successful because the other 84 percent have to come back and do it again. That’s where your business comes from. (p.9)

  • Caution against investing in businesses which profit from your failure. This is particularly concerning as weight-cycling (repeated gaining and losing weight) is shown to be more dangerous than carrying extra weight. This fact is cited extensively in this book, too!

3. Researchers have known for a long time that diets don’t work. Now you know it, too. (p. 15)

  • In this chapter, Dr. Mann shares how she and her students dug into all the studies often used to validate why a particular weight loss programs/diet will work. She found three major flaws in various health and weight related studies on weight. It is also noted why it is important for you to understand the gold standard of research and how to be a better consumer and questioner of the data being quoted. “The research says…” need not shut down the conversation but instead be a conversation starter.

4. Think of willpower as brute strength. The amount of you need is larger than the amount of it you have, and the amount you have is nearly depleted by nearly everything you do. (p. 48)

  • Unpacking the science behind willpower, Dr. Mann points out that willpower – when used as a tool to maintain health –  is not the best approach to lifestyle changes. She eloquently helps you understand the science of willpower so you can make better choices and decrease the physical, emotional and spiritual struggles around food + your health.

5. Shame is more painful than guilt, and to add injury to insult, shame has been shown to lead to a release of the stress hormone cortisol, and another kind of cell in the immune system (called a proinflammatory cytokine), which, among other things can promote the growth of disease. (p.62)

  • When shame is running your life around how you care for your body, diets – or some kind of restrictive or rigid rules around feeding and moving your body – are often a go-to response. Diet related behavior is one of shame’s bff’s.

6. But variables such as exercise, weight cycling, socieoeconomic status, fat distribution, and discrimination all factor into a person’s overall health…I hope you’re not still under the impression that you have to diet or obesity will kill you. If you exercise, eat nutritiously, avoid weight cycling, and get good quality medical care, you do not need to worry about obesity shortening your life. Especially if you shield yourself from weight stigma and the stress it causes… (p. 82+84-85)

  • Chapter 5 is powerful and provocative. It digs deep into the topic of obesity and myth-busting many narratives around carrying extra weight. The above words outline the complex factors which are a part of an accurate definition of health.

7. The benefits of exercise simply cannot be denied. Regular exercise can increase your life span, prevent disease, improve your mood, aid creativity, help you sleep better, and allow you to age more gracefully. These benefits are more easily attained than dramatic weight loss, and can be yours even if you do not lose a pound. (p.185)

  • Activity is a powerful indicator of your health. Finding an activity you will be motivated to do regularly is key. Now over-exercise, over-use injuries and complications related to hydrating and nutrition are flags that your activity has crossed over from being a positive positive part of your health into a negative one. At Potentia, we help our clients (re) define activity when this happens so moving their body can return to being a part of wellness and not the sole manager emotional pain.

There is so much good information packed into this book. I hope you check it out.

If you read the book, I would love to know what impacted you the most on how you view health.

All the best as you continue to challenge yourself to (re) define health in your life.

With gratitude –

Rebecca Bass-Ching, LMFT, Founder + Director of Potentia Family Therapy, Inc.

 

 

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